As I write this the light of the full moon still shines despite not being able to see it in the midday sky, and so, I am drawn to invite you into stillness for a moment, into silence.
And when you sit silently for a moment, scanning down into your body, what do you feel?
Is there a weight or a tightness? Residing perhaps in fear, uncertainty or doubt?
There is uncertainty in the state of the World, and it may be there too, within our own lives.
And we can forget that these external factors are not simply experienced 'out there', but, as you may be able to feel from your body, they can be experienced 'in here'.
And at this moment, under the Aries full moon, the constant barrage of challenging news may shine a light on the tension we feel, the frustration, the impatience, the anger or the angst? So bored are we of being offered false hope, false narratives, false expectations, false values, false trust.
Last night as I was about to fall asleep, in my safety, in my quiet, in my calm, I was provoked into giving a response to the threat of nuclear war, of the role of the different global governments in their power games and a condemnation of my techniques to move into sleeping oblivion, and as if a fire had been lit within me, I defended myself like a raging dragon would it's young. Angry words were spat in fire and flames which continued to glow into the darkness long after my mouth had closed, the inner fire had burned out and the lights had been extinguished.
This was the response of self-protection.
Because the World out there may not be safe, but my world in my home, that, I thought was safe,
And it reminded me, we are not immune to the process we are all being called to go through.
No matter if you have powerful practices throughout the day that keep you grounded, centred, loving, and in peace. There will come a time when your sense of safety will be disturbed and the true depths of pain and trauma that have been residing within will be discovered. Needing to be revealed in order to be released.
In my own self-revelation as the dragon, I was so grateful to discover what I had been holding, because now like I would a child, I was able to hold myself - I allowed myself to cry and to be vulnerable. And to admit that I could do nothing and that was ok. And that I could allow this deep lack of safety and sense of frustration and anger to be released, as it does not serve me.
And when I awoke this morning, the sun was shining through the window, a lightness shimmered in my body and I went for a beautiful ride, beneath a pale blue sky. Felt my breath flowing in and out of my lungs. And I knew the truth. I am alive, and this right now, in this moment is where my power is, is where my love is, is where my joy is. For these are all only ever experienced in the present.
When you listen closely what do you hear inside? What angers, frustrations, pain lies within that you hold so carefully dormant?
Can you take yourself to somewhere quiet? A place where you are completely alone and just let that pain come out, let the anguish be released... perhaps its a cry or a yell or a weep or a wail. Perhaps you need to hit a pillow?
Don't be afraid of how you feel. Your feelings are not you, they just show you the truth of how you feel - of what you are holding onto. And when you allow yourself to feel them fully and completely - with the dial of intensity going up and up .. you will find that like my dragon, they will burn out of your body. And you can be free from their burden.
Under this Aries full moon, it is the perfect time to release what no longer serves you. Allow the moon to witness all that you are and to be a physical reminder of the life that is here in the present.
With many moon blessings, and in my own vulnerability,